" Do you know what the definition of a hero is? Someone who gets other people killed. You can look it up later. "
BASICS
RETIRE INFO: Retire
NAME: Esther
GENDER: Female
PRONOUNS: She/her/hers
ORIENTATION: Biromantic bisexual
BIRTHDATE: Early Spring 2736
AGE: 38 Turns as of Late Fall 2774
LOCATION: Fort Weyr
OCCUPATION: Rider
WING: Aurora Wing
APPEARANCE
EYES: Dark brown
HAIR: Brown-black
HEIGHT AND BUILD: 5’10”, average
PLAY-BY: Gina Torres
FULL APPEARANCE:
Esther is a tall woman with broad shoulders. She walks with a bit of a limp where her right leg is stiff and difficult to bend, but this doesn't stop her from being slightly on the muscular side otherwise. Her skin is dark and coppery, and she has dark brown , almond-shaped eyes. The right is half occluded by scar tissue, and the scar continues along the side of her face and into her hairline. Her hair is black and tightly curled, usually pulled back in some sort of "out of the way" style—a loose braid or bun.
Her right upper arm and shoulder bear thick Threadscore scars, as does the outside of her right leg from upper thigh to mid-calf, and she has trouble bending at the knee. She's missing the thumb and forefinger of her right hand, and that side of her palm seems to be bent slightly inward, the remaining fingers weak but somewhat functional. She's unable to speak much above a breathy whisper, but rarely even attempts that.
She's missing the first two fingers on her right hand, and that side of her palm seems to be bent slightly inward, the result of a poor landing on Keramerth's part.
PERSONALITY
PERSONALITY:
Silence. Once a loud, raging tempest, Esther has become a silent shadow of a woman. She rarely makes an effort to communicate, and despite her ability to at least whisper, she generally refuses to, relying on signs and writing on the rare moments when she's together enough to even try. Little holds appeal for her any more; she has to be reminded to eat, and doesn't seem to feel tiredness until she falls asleep wherever she happens to be. The only person she seems to care about in the slightest in Tuckal, and she's more concerned with keeping the goldrider safe than she is with her on any personal level. Her two fire lizards she tolerates, and attempts to keep fed and happy, but that's a sense of duty rather than actual caring.
What efforts she used to put into being the best rider she could be has now become an obsession with cleaning. Her hands are often chapped, her fingertips almost rubbed raw from constant contact with soap. If she isn't cleaning something that actually needs cleaning, she's re-scrubbing the floors of her quarters for the third time that week. Her efforts, save for where they're aimed at helping Tuckal, are directionless; all attempts to have her help out with cleaning the kitchens have resulted in her wandering off after a short while.
All she retains of her former self are a rigid adherence to duty and a temper that, at times, can still flare with no warning. However, instead of the words she would have once leaned on, she resorts immediately to violence. Her loyalties seem to lie with Tuckal alone, and just about anything seems capable of setting her off. Memories, slights real or imagined, even just a mention of her name not directed at her.
She is self-assured, proud, and confident, to the point that she can come across as somewhat arrogant and haughty. She doesn't take criticism well, and will occasionally argue with her detractors, trying to prove that her way is in fact the best way. She tends to be rather bossy, and often expects people to conform to her methods and thinking. Though she prefers to be in a position of authority, she is perhaps better-suited to a secondary role, though she is not good at taking orders. Her respect must be earned, but once it is earned she is uncompromisingly loyal and even, if she believes someone is a good leader, somewhat obedient.
Perhaps Esther's greatest downfall is her short temper, which is quickly triggered by any number of things. She is highly judgmental, and if someone she doesn't like annoys her, will readily begin gesturing angrily at them (previously she would have just started yelling). Her pet peeves include rudeness, ill-thought-out actions, deceit, and anything that puts another person in danger--though she rarely spares a thought for her own safety and will leap into the fray without hesitation if it means saving someone else. However, a direct insult to her will almost inevitably result in her anger being unleashed on the person. Despite her short fuse, she recognizes that her words are not always kindly meant, and she will usually apologize for her actions after a period of time. Her anger lasts about as long as it takes to build, and she readily forgives.
Despite her somewhat abrasive manner, Esther usually acts with the greater good in mind. Though confident, she is not particularly ambitious, and her primary goal is to reconcile conflicts wherever she can, believing that prolonged anger is the quickest route to failure. She is generally altruistic, and is especially willing to give of her time when possible. She is highly protective of those people that she cares about, which is pretty much everyone, even when she doesn't necessarily show it well.
HISTORY
FAMILY:
Mother, Therean, Trader
Father, Esallo, Trader
Younger sister, Lorea, Trader
Younger brother, Therallo, Trader
SIGNIFICANT OTHER: None
BIRTHPLACE: Mountains near Fort Hold
HISTORY:
Esther was born to two Traders early one spring as they made their winding way through the mountain passes once the snow receded, making for Fort Hold with goods that they hoped hadn't been seen all through the winter. She grew up with the caravan, living the nomadic Trader life, rarely staying in one place for more than a couple of weeks at a time and usually less. Though she was the oldest of three children born to her parents, she was only one of many with the caravan, and grew up surrounded by other children, accustomed to being taken care of by those older than her and also to taking care of those who were younger. From an early age, she was taught that it was important to work collaboratively for the benefit of all, and that no one person's work was any more or less important than anyone else's.
Despite all that Trader life offered, being able to see much of Pern in all seasons, freedom to roam mostly where they willed, as she grew older Esther grew tired of it. She began to be jealous of those who lived in Holds and the stability and certainty of their lives. They were never forced to endure days of travel in cold rain, far from any help, and didn't have to worry about anything beyond feeding themselves, which she always thought seemed rather easy for people who didn't have to carry all they owned with them. Still nothing could compel her to leave her family, and though she was increasingly discontented, she never once tried to leave them behind.
That was before Thread fell. It was hardly a surprise; black dust had been raining down all winter long, and more than one rider had warned them of the eventuality. However, ill-prepared even for what they knew was coming, the caravan barely made it to the shelter of some caves in time when it first fell in their vicinity. Most of the wagons had to be left behind in their flight towards safety, and little save the metal fastenings remained when all was over. Over the course of minutes, their entire livelihood was destroyed, and few seemed to have the will to pick up the pieces. Esther was one of them, but she knew quickly enough that she couldn't stay much longer, and when they made it to Fort Hold once again, she managed to secure herself a place in the kitchens there while the rest of her family continued on without her.
"Content" wasn't a word to describe her while at Fort. Cooking was something she'd always done because it was a necessary chore, not because she gained any enjoyment out of it, but she'd been lucky to manage to talk her way into even that sort of work. So she convinced herself that she had best accept that it was her life and that she shouldn't expect anything better. It worked, sometimes, but usually she remembered that she had once had dreams of greatness, though she had never quite figured out exactly how to attain that.
Watching the dragons flying overhead, preparing for the next Threadfall, sometimes made her wish she could join them, but the reality of her situation always kept her rooted firmly on the ground. She didn't even believe the bluerider at first when he came to Search her, convinced that he had it wrong. After all, if she was rider material, wouldn't someone have noticed at some point over the last twenty-four Turns? But he couldn't be dissuaded and, scarcely believing it to be true, she allowed herself to be taken to the Weyr.
UPDATES
- Impressed Keramerth, the extremely grumpy, quiet bronze
- Was extremely disappointed; she'd wanted a small dragon and instead got a bigoted bronze
- Became largely socially isolated as a result of her and her dragon's anger
- Eventually made friends with Abby, has few (if any) other friends
- Keramerth landed poorly in one of their first few Falls; he rolled over on her, breaking her dominant right arm in multiple places and nearly crushing her hand. She lost the first two fingers on that hand, and has extremely limited use of her remaining fingers and thumb.
- In a subsequent Fall, inhaled half-burned Thread, destroying her ability to speak any louder than a quiet whisper.
- Is finally learning to write left-handed, as it's become a necessity for communicating. Is also learning some sign language, but is limited by her right hand.
- Keramerth caught Serapheth in her second flight, causing Esther to become Senior Weyrleader, a role she didn't really want at all in the first place
- Was involved when Benden dragons attacked during the Touching; Keramerth refused to leave the Sands after that until the eggs hatched.
- Has been dealing with the situation involving the kidnapped riders
- Got a second flit when Little Monster refused to let one of her eggs go; Esther got the green from that egg, Slip, who is thankfully not entirely like her mother.
- Had a falling-out with Keltin when ze blamed her along with Tuckal for not doing enough to get the kidnapped riders back
- Keramerth was scored badly in a Fall, and managed to crash-land in their weyr. Esther was flung from the straps, which were almost entirely destroyed by Thread. She struck a piece of furniture head-first, badly damaging her right eye and leaving her with a large scar from there to just above her temple. Keramerth survived only a couple of minutes longer before going between. Esther lost much of the sight in her right eye, though still retains some, especially to the inside of her vision, and the scoring on her right arm and leg left obvious scars. Her arm mostly healed, though her leg will always remain stiff, making running difficult, though not necessarily painful.
- A year later, her recovery has not gone well. She's turned much of her energy toward obsessively cleaning, and has appointed herself Tuckal's personal cleaner, whether she wants her to or not. She's lost significant weight, and for the most part doesn't even attempt to interact with people.
- Punched the visiting Istan Weyrwoman, mixing her up somewhat with Kallia.